There’s no sorrier sight than a naked Christmas tree, bereft of tinsel, blowing between the wheelie bin and the recycling box like Nordic tumbleweed. Only a couple of weeks ago, this handsome chap was adorned and adored, guarding its stash of joyful surprises. And now? Wood chip.
That was a metaphor in case you missed it.
Has January turned you into the forlorn tree, as you stand wedged in the commuter carriage or lie in the bath, poking ripples you thought you didn’t have? Are you the ghost of Christmas past?
Well fear not. January is a state of mind and I’m here to pimp your kaleidoscope!
TIP 1. Create a Christmas toilet shrine.
If you grieve the passing of Christmas as much as I do, then keep the festive feeling alive by decorating the downstairs loo with all the paraphernalia that normally decks the hall! You might consider wiring up some flashing lights to come on when the door locks. Or why not set O Come All Ye Faithful to blast out every time you perch happily on your throne, clutching a copy of A Christmas Carol? Either way, you’re guaranteed be high on ‘yo ho ho’ whatever the season!
TIP 2. Sell your rubbish presents on eBay and buy something you really want
Goodbye electric rolling pin, rainbow coloured lawn mower extension cable and mug in the shape of a toilet. Hello…whatever!
TIP 3. Create your own January Advent Calendar
Get that ‘February feeling’ by designing your own January Advent Calendar and counting down to the big day with the help of uplifting messages behind each window. For example, the 6th January could tell you that Christmas is officially over (or is it the 5th?); the 15th might say, ‘Beware the Ides of Jan – time to trash your diet!’ The 24th would read, ‘Only one week left to file your online tax return and avoid the fine’ And finally, the 31st will proclaim ‘It’s February Eve – let’s Party!’
On the following morning, you‘ll wake up, head banging but happy in the knowledge that all the fuss is finally over for another year…perhaps reflecting momentarily on the true meaning of January.